1. My Life In 100 Blogs

I’ve never taken the easy or obvious route. I like a challenge, living close to the edge, walking over the horizon, pushing the boundaries, making waves, stirring hearts, fighting back! Of course, all of this comes as part of the package we call Christianity, rightly understood and lived.

Unfortunately, clothed in the frailty of a human being, living this way can also lead to disaster when you take your eyes off the goal. If you push and shove enough, you end up falling into a hole, along with your human ambition.

So this is a personal story.

Now here’s the big question: should I be writing this book given its highly personal subject matter? Answer: Undoubtedly, yes. For I fear there are many other people taking a similar journey to my own who may still be desperately trying to find a way out of the pit. Mine is not a story of triumph, happy endings and miraculous outcomes, although I have encountered my fair share of all. It is an honest account of an ordinary life made extraordinary by the grace and power of God. It is a story of amazing miracles and abundant failures, of mountains and valleys, rivers of life and deserts of despair.

I have a sneaking feeling that most of the people who enjoy exposing the failures of others, live in constant fear that their own masks will be ripped away, revealing the unsurprising truth that they too are frail human beings trying desperately to live a double a life. I like to feel I am unpredictable. But those who know me best, have an uncanny knack of being prophetic at the most inconvenient of times! There have been moments in my life when I have been too private and other moments when I have been too open.

Trying to be me is a tough call sometimes!

My father came from good old Victorian stock! Stiff upper lip! Never complain about your lot in life. Keep going – there is always someone worse off than you are. His attitude to discipline was harsh. I had many a wallop round the backside when I stepped out of line. Mum and dad were quite volatile and it could be frightening and unsettling if you were within earshot of an argument. I don’t think it fair to go into details here, but suffice it to say, life in the Flashman household could be challenging – especially for a small person.

I have met many people over the years who live in defeat on a daily basis, blaming the way they were brought up, their parent, their siblings, their uncles, aunties, the goverment, the police, social services, the dog next door and the black cat that crossed the road in the middle of the night. If we blame the past for they way we are now, it’s a huge cop-out and not being honest about who we are.

Life is tough for us all. But we need to process the hurt and stop blaming everybody else for our behaviour. We need to take responsibility for our own lives amd build a better future for us and our families.

About Steve Flashman

Steve Flashman is a singer/songwriter, published author and has appeared on TV many times over the years. He toured extensively as a professional musician and set-up a Short Term Service Charity which worked in some of the poorest areas of the world. He is currently living in Buckinghamshire UK with his wife Sarah and is Vicar of two rural parish churches.

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